In Particular Histories, I construct daydreams, longings, memories, and fears as they pertain to aging and the transition from childhood to the acceptance of adult roles. I am interested in the complications of this shift and the discomfort of the liminal space between childish thought and adult anxieties.
I am concerned with how this transition relates to our faith in the unlikely: When, exactly, in the aging process does our loss of faith occur, and when do we begin to consider the improbable prospects in life to actually be impossible? In the face of grim circumstances and odds, what makes us follow through with what we hope in? We are taught against the expectation and absurdity of our immature thoughts and fears, and we begin to see them as increasingly implausible from an adult perspective. I believe that we do not give these desires and fears enough validity. Therefore, we justify allowing them to pass out of our minds without recognition.
By constructing a fictional world, I am able to validate these questions of possibility and give them physicality through self-portraiture. The image making process anchors them in the reality of an act or performance with an evidentiary result. I hope, through my photographs, to open up the boundaries of possibility for the viewer and cause them to reflect on their own intuitions and anxieties. While the source and inspiration for producing and carrying through with my work is motivated personally, I hope that in the end, my images can point to our common human condition, struggle, and desire for illumination.